Top Ten Tuesday: Dumb Things I Have Googled

1. Beagle +crazy + running around

Sammy does this thing where he gets a glossed over look in his eyes and all the energy is drained from his normally human-ish peepers into his legs. He is propelled by some mysterious force to run in figure eights around the living room and then culminates this show with a fervent tail chasing scene until he collapses into a trance-like state and catches his breath on the floor. I actually found information on the phenomenon on the ourbeagleworld.com website under the “Psycho Dog” thread.

2. Why do I want to cry during Zumba?

Every once in a while, in the middle of some upbeat electro-latin dance tune I get  choked up. There is no common factor I can find between the incidences. The internet said something about endorphins blah blah blah. Who knows? I might just be crying at my reflection.The only time I remember a real reason for wanting to cry during Zumba was when we danced to the song from the South African World Cup.. That was just because I felt sentimental about the Peace Corps and I had heard that song about a thousand times that summer.

3. Is Biz Markie dead?

No, but his career is on life support.

4. dog + ears + hot

It doesn’t really mean anything.

5. Which onions are spicy?

I singed my roommate’s eyeballs with the overuse of sauteed white onions, which prompted my need for research. Google gods lead me to a Buzzfeed article about onions.

Onions!

 

6. Is all of the food at Cracker Barrel frozen?

It was actually hard to find the answer to this. My guess is yes, but my research was derailed by all of the blogs and discussion threads dedicated to hating Cracker Barrel. It’s fascinating.

7.  Powder coffee creamer + horse hooves

I jokingly tell people that we shouldn’t drink the creamer that is supplied in the break room because it has horse hooves in it. Then I thought to myself, “Did I hear that somewhere?? Is it true?” Google says there are no horse hooves, but there is hydrogenated oil, which is even worse. Apparently it is some terrible crime against nature where the evil food scientists inject metals in oil products making some near-plastic, hybrid, undead food monster.

8. Vegas outfit + not that slutty

I got an error message and then my computer anthropomorphized, laughed at me and poked my love handles.

9. Can plants feel pain?

According to a PRI article the answer is: Maybe?? I am still going to apologize to my basil plant for eating its delicious leaves.

10. What does “turn down for what” mean?

Well, I went straight to Urban Dictionary for this. Feel free to laugh at me heartily for not being cool enough to even turn up with the appropriate frequency to ask myself what I would indeed turn down for.

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